What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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