Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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