I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
A+ Viking dick
Randomize
