i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
