I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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