So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
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I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
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