we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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