Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize