It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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