addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Randomize