What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
i now understand why vodka
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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