He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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