i permit you to call me
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize