I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.