it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
