if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
