Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
