In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I'm sobbing to NWA
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize