I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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