We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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