U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
