..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
