i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize