He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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