Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
