Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
