The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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