All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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