did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
