thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them