Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag