: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
