Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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