hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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