You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
