So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
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toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
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Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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