I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Randomize
