Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
