His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
And then my night got REAL pukey
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Randomize
