Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize