Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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