i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
