South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
