Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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