the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Randomize
