Texts From Last Night

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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Pregnant stripper...not hot.

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  (734): Pregnant stripper...not hot. http://tfl.nu/9fe2
  Replies (20) Good night (685) Bad night (1615)
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  (516): View more from New York

  why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?

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  (516): why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo? http://tfl.nu/oqag
  Replies (16) Good night (2861) Bad night (768)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy

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  (208): I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy http://tfl.nu/tuq9
  Replies (16) Good night (942) Bad night (3366)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?

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  (210): she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know? http://tfl.nu/j2zq
  Replies (50) Good night (7020) Bad night (840)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM

  (416): View more from Toronto

  From?

  (647): View more from Ontario

  Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...

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  (647): It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM (416): From? (647): Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table... http://tfl.nu/hv77
  Replies (16) Good night (2494) Bad night (5506)
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  (718): View more from New York

  We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.

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  (718): We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged. http://tfl.nu/etq6
  Replies (7) Good night (2908) Bad night (1462)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.

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  (610): Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory. http://tfl.nu/8tn6
  Replies (3) Good night (1056) Bad night (1856)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.

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  (910): You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year. http://tfl.nu/jiz9
  Replies (12) Good night (3995) Bad night (1036)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.

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  (860): its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party. http://tfl.nu/bik1
  Replies (5) Good night (2364) Bad night (806)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him

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  (202): when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him http://tfl.nu/8eei
  Replies (7) Good night (2359) Bad night (910)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?

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  (314): I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season? http://tfl.nu/6vbo
  Replies (6) Good night (1626) Bad night (601)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note

  (1+44): View more from

  Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!

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  (+44): Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note (1+44): Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud! http://tfl.nu/x31j
  Replies (4) Good night (1120) Bad night (568)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?

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  (617): A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck? http://tfl.nu/zk7d
  Replies (13) Good night (3752) Bad night (815)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.

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  (306): He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating. http://tfl.nu/hhgj
  Replies (4) Good night (924) Bad night (300)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face

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  (703): there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face http://tfl.nu/al6a
  Replies (2) Good night (653) Bad night (492)

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