The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
