he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Randomize
