Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize