And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
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