You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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